I was in the Grand Hall, listening to my sponsor’s briefing when I read yesterday’s hematology lecture notes. I was going through the anticoagulant process when I found one sentences that startled me.
I stared at these words, a bit shocked. Fibrin orchestrates its own destruction.

Fibrin is a coagulant that’s used to stop bleeding. However, after fibrin has finished its purposes, fibrin itself conducts its own destruction process. Something about these words makes me feel… unsettled.

I still have yet to figure out why. I mean, the first thing that came across my mind would be the angel of death. I compare the angel with fibrin. Both of them orchestrate they own destruction. The angel of death would take his own life in the hereafter, when the angel had finished his job. Just like fibrin.

Both kill their own self, because that’s their final job.

Fibrin has to kill itself in order to prevent thrombosis. The angle of death kills itself, and that makes it as the final living being to die in the hereafter. Both are willing to kill themselves, because God told them to. And they follow the commandment. They follow God without any question and with no hesitations.

Are you willing to sacrifices yourself for God? Do you follow each and every of God’s commandment without any hesitation at all? Do you trust God with your life and death?

Why then do you trust God?

…

Let me change the subject for the moment. Sometimes, I don’t remember and don’t know the reason why I am writing this in this blog.

Is it to express my thought for the day? Or is it to release the tension? Or is it just to share the few knowledge that I think is worthy to be shared with who knows who?

Here I am, behind my desk…writing.

I know about flaw. We all have it. Heck, I have plenty of it. I admit that. And I apologize beforehand if my flaws had offended anyone. Truly, it is unintentional.

This is just few random thoughts that enter my head.

So, I have short of 2 weeks before my final bock exam. I do try to cramp as much lecture notes in my head as soon as I could. I tried my best. I don’t want to blame for my lack of effort/ usaha. I know that at least I’ve tried my best.

The rest is just the occasional doa and tawakal. Menang atau syahid! Allahuakbar!