Things We Learn

I am no expert, but at least I know this.

Once upon time, I wish to be a grown up. Now that I am old enough, the wish is not so tempting anymore.

Sometimes, I dislike how human thinks. For example, like how we’re never satisfied (...the song Maher Zain: Awaken suddenly rings through my head). I know, I know, it’s because of this very feeling that human are able to move forward and build these amazing contraptions (machine/rockets)... but you don’t indulge with it especially when it comes to your personal desire (nafsu), period.

If you play and toy around with your nafsu, it is like getting a one-way ticket to hell. Nauzubillah.

Every day, we learn new things. Among the things that I learn today is that there’s no use in regretting things, as in drowning yourself with guilt.

You see, I know that death is compulsory for everyone. Death might be just around the corner for all of us. “Setiap saat berharga,” my kak ngah said. God gives us life. Life is precious. Then, why not treasure it while you can.

I learn to value life, my life and others. I learn to be thankful, to learn to live as if life ends tomorrow, to be thankful of the little things. Little things that can make me smile for miles (anagram for smile)... mom asking to cover aurah, and our welfare, dad making breakfast, lil bro and sis help each other, talking with friends, calls from love ones, just everyday life really... Alhamdulillah!

And whenever I make a lousy choice, I don’t want to whine and drown in guilt at the decisions I make. I know that I am no longer a child. I would face the fact that I make a mistake, and that I MAKE A CHOICE.

I make a choice and LEARN from it. Then, pray for forgiveness from God, knowing He is Ar-Rahman, Ar-Rahim. I accept that we’re not perfect, incapable of being one but must never stop in trying to be one even though there's no way that's going to happen. God is perfect. We are only human. Don’t try to play god. La-ila-ha-ilallah. There is no god but Allah.

I am no expert, but at least I know this.

We’re never alone.

It happened to me and maybe to some of you, to feel as if you are alone. I didn’t realize how wrong I was then. You see, when we admit that we believe in God, the angle and of course other pillars of iman, we are admitting that we believe that we are never alone.

I am not talking about the ufo nonsense, thank you very much. Speaking of which, I don’t believe in alien. Why? Simple, because the QURAN didn’t say so. Period.

When you encounter with someone who feel sad, depreessed, annoyed and claimed that they’re alone and thus miserable. Tell them “You say, you believe in God, angle, the Quran, the Hereafter and the Qada’ and Qadar, but how true is that statement to you?”

God is always there for you. There are angles around us. (and of cuz jin, but let’s just ignore them)

Astaghfirullah. Years before, I am among those who degraded the true value of Iman. Years before, If I read this stuff that I am writing down I would groan and says “Urgh, ustazah! there’s she goes again yada yada yada,” and turn a blind eye.

I am no expert, but at least I know this.

If Islam is a person, I can already picture her crying. Crying sadly at what’s happening at the world now. And if possible, I feel like going up to her, hug and comfort her...and also feel guilty as we too among those who cause her sadness. I would also say to her that human do no justice, when in fact Islam is very beautiful.

You know, when you met Islam. You'll fall in love with it. You see, since I was little I have this little envy. No, a great jealousy. How I envy the 'ulama, qari, ustaz. Why not? I think you know the answer already.

I am no expert, but at least I know this.